Now that you’re queasy, let me assure you I’m not hurt that bad. Pro football players have to be some of the toughest fuckers out there. Hell, even the kicker gets turned upside down occasionally. It’s not like boxing where you have months between beatings. These guys pummel the shit out of each other from August to January. Unless, of course, you’re the quarterback. What pussies.
Have you ever heard about an injury and thought, “Seriously, what a wuss. It can’t hurt that bad.”Or “He should just tough it out.” Isn’t that we tell our kids when they are bleeding from the eyes? Unfortunately for runners, our injuries are not glamorous. Tell someone you have a stress fracture and they may offer you a Prozac and an ice pack. Turf Toe? Why the fuck were you running barefoot? Shin Splints? Really, you’re making that up right? Bum Achilles heal? Yea, I can see how that may hurt.
I felt that way about groin injuries. These 300 pound men go down for 12 weeks with a groin pull. It can't be worse than blue balls, can it? Rub one out and call it a day. Wimps, I say! Maybe they should have backed off the bedroom gymnastics. Leave the pommel horse alone and stick to a mattress.
The sound it made resonated over the music that was blasting through my iPod. I probably didn’t actually hear the tendon rip, but it makes for a better story that I did. After that, my gait resembled that of a post-prom-night virgin for about 6 months. Again, I am humbled.
The bottom line is that I have suffered an aggravated groin pull (a recurring injury) and a left quad strain. My PT compared my left side flexibility to that of a sensible national health care plan: non-existent. I have run 3 times in 21 days and all hopes for 26.2 miles are gone. Now that I can finally walk without looking like a drunk who is trying real hard to keep it together, my new plan is to bicycle and elliptical at the gym for the next two weeks. While this meager attempt to regain some fitness will hopefully propel me to feel physically confidant to run the half marathon, it doesn’t replace shoe to pavement. Or will it?
Now that I have droned on for too long, I do have a couple quick things to say.
1. I’ve been slacking on posts. I know, and I’m sorry. Between the depression from the injury and finals at school, my motivation was all but sucked up into the constant ache in my left leg. But I’m back now….hide your children.
2. Heads up: While this blog will still contain a lot of running shit, I’m going to start injecting a fair amount of social commentary. You can tell me to shut the fuck up, but only if you’re nice about it.
3. I over-trained and I am now paying the price. More on that in the next couple days
4. Raise your hand if you are doing the Bolder Boulder. See you out there!
5. Why didn’t I sign up for Warrior Dash earlier? Procrastination blows.
6. It feels good to write again.